relatively unambitious list of responsibilites for my personal assistant

  1. clean my glasses.
  2. remind me to take my iron supplement.
  3. make me a sandwich.
  4. get the coffee, unprompted. be always getting the coffee.
  5. occasionally act terrified, possibly while falling backward from a seated position, when i walk into a room, while waving your arms above your head and shouting, “AAAAH! YOU’RE SO HUGE! WHEN DID YOU BECOME SO TALL AND MENACING??! PLEASE, FOR THE SAKE OF THE CHILDREN, DON’T EAT OR STEP ON ME!! AAAH ENORMOUS."
  6. suggest the sorbet.
  7. flip the camera obscura album.
  8. move the laundry from wherever it is to another location, so that the original location can be utilized for another purpose. do this several times throughout the day / week.
  9. take the movies back to the library.
  10. suggest a game of darts.